Comments on: What IS co-dependency, anyway?

By: thepeoplestherapist

thepeoplestherapist — Sat, 30 Jan 2010 21:16:55 +0000

Yes, Jen – that’s certainly a familiar story. Co-dependency and the COA experience go hand in hand. Thanks for sharing your experience.

By: jen

jen — Sat, 30 Jan 2010 21:14:34 +0000

Those of us brought up in alcoholic families deal with it as well. In my situation Dad’s drinking was the favorite child in my family. Mom’s was co-dependent; always focused on Dad. And of course that made me ripe for the tendency to be as well. As you said Will; the needs of the child…

By: thepeoplestherapist

thepeoplestherapist — Sat, 30 Jan 2010 16:15:40 +0000

Thanks, Pam. Co-dependency, at least with a definition that everyone can understand, is all too common. Keep checking this space – I’ll have plenty more to say about it in up-coming posts.

By: Pam

Pam — Sat, 30 Jan 2010 16:01:35 +0000

Hi Will, this totally resonated with me. Thank you for this post today. It’s a good reminder of what I need to do to begin to get over my co-dependence.

By: thepeoplestherapist

thepeoplestherapist — Sat, 30 Jan 2010 15:48:42 +0000

Absolutely, John. A lot of gay people grow up feeling like they have to compensate for the “terrible secret” they know will devastate their security in their parents’ love. So they become the “best little boy in the world” and do everything for everyone…except themselves. The co-dependent pattern crops up not only in their relationships – it permeates their working lives and friendships as well.

Thanks for the comment!

By: John R. Sullivan

John R. Sullivan — Sat, 30 Jan 2010 15:38:09 +0000

And this so addresses the question of SO many gay men being drawn to “service” and “care”
industries, I believe. And I am speaking as an “Event Planner” for 25 years! Thanks, Will!